Where Is My Joy Today?

Motherhood is a profound act of love, and for Black mothers, it carries generations of strength, resilience, and care. Black motherhood is legacy, love, and labor all at once. In a world that too often overlooks or misjudges their struggles, Black moms continue to nurture life, culture, and joy.

This Black Maternal Health Week, we honor that fullness, acknowledging both the challenges and the deep, deserving joy that Black motherhood holds.

Your joy is not a luxury. It is a necessary and important part of motherhood that should not be delayed or denied. Joy is clinical, and its absence should be treated with the same tenacity and determination as other medical problems.

Let’s talk about what it means to live in “survival mode.” So many Black mothers are taught, often praised, for being strong at all costs. But that expectation can become a weight, pushing them to carry everything while setting their own wellness aside. Over time, surviving can start to feel like the only way of living. But it doesn’t have to be that way. Joy is a return; it’s the understanding that joy has always existed within Black motherhood, even when it’s been buried under responsibility, expectation, and survival. It’s the laughter that used to come more freely. The softness that was never meant to disappear. The moments of peace that still belong to you, even if they’ve been pushed aside. When Black mothers make space for joy, they begin to reclaim rest, softness, and personal power.

Here’s the thing about joy that Black mothers often forget: it’s a birthright. You do not have to work and struggle to be worthy of happiness. By simply existing, you deserve to enjoy your time on this earth. Joy looks different for everyone, but even the smallest moments can bring a spark. Here are some ideas for you to explore to learn what joy means for you:

• Music and laughter or stillness and peace

• Identity outside of motherhood

• Receiving care and help without guilt

• Setting boundaries and feeling confident in your doing so

Though you may stumble upon joyful moments by chance, you should also actively create them for yourself. A “joy trigger” is an experience that creates happiness for you. Keep note of these personal moments and seek out joy triggers whenever possible. On the other hand, joy rituals are intentional and consistent. These can be as simple as getting a pastry with your coffee every Tuesday, or as complex as picking up a new hobby. Remember that as a human being, you are deserving of joy and rest and should not feel guilty for making time for them.

Practice small mindset shifts to help reclaim yourself. Instead of thinking “How am I surviving?”, think “Where is my joy today?” Black mothers deserve to feel whole, not just good enough.

If you’re having trouble finding your joy, there’s no need to worry. Inspired Counseling Center is a maternal mental health practice dedicated to helping women through the highs and lows of life. Click the button below to visit our website and schedule a consultation. Your happiness is not a luxury, it’s a priority.

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